By Dr. Ashley Renea, PMHNP-BC When the final school bell rings and summer break begins, we often think of sunshine, beach days, and long-overdue relaxation. But for many families, summer also brings disrupted routines, childcare stress, emotional dysregulation, and unexpected mental health challenges.
Whether you're a parent trying to stay afloat while managing work and kids home from school, or a child transitioning from the structure of the school year to the free-form chaos of summer, mental health matters. Here’s how to make summer mentally healthier for the whole family — without adding pressure or guilt. For Parents: Summer Can Feel... Not So Breezy Summer often promises freedom, but let’s be real — it can also feel like too much freedom. When structure disappears, anxiety can creep in. The constant push to “make memories” or be the perfect summer parent is exhausting. Admittedly, I’m a memory making parent and while I love making plans and travelling, it’s exhausting, and self-care is critical. 1. Let Go of the Pressure to Entertain You don’t need to schedule every moment with magic. Boredom is not a problem to fix — it’s a doorway to creativity. Give yourself permission to do less. Mental health tip: Try a “slow day” each week. Let the day unfold naturally with no big plans. This reduces overwhelm for both you and your kids. 2. Prioritize Your Own Mental Reset The invisible labor of parenting doesn’t stop in summer — in fact, it may double. Carve out even small windows to restore your nervous system. That might be 10 minutes in the car with your favorite podcast, or a morning walk alone. One of my clients, who works in the department of education, reported being happy about having to continue to go to work during the summer because this was her quiet time. No kids and no shame in that! Finding quiet in our noisy world can feel like another chore. Mental health tip: Don't wait for a breakdown to set boundaries. If you feel resentment building, it’s time to adjust your load. 3. Embrace “Good Enough” Parenting You don't have to be Pinterest-worthy. Your child needs a regulated parent, not a perfect one. Try this affirmation: “It’s okay to be calm and imperfect. I am not responsible for creating a flawless summer — only a safe one.” For Kids: The Mental Shift from School to Summer Children (especially those with ADHD, anxiety, or autism spectrum traits) may struggle with the sudden loss of structure in summer. I often hear from parents of these children during breaks that they believe their children need more medication during times of transition, but likely it’s more an adjustment period that they need. Without clear expectations or routine, emotional dysregulation often follows. 1. Maintain Light Routine Anchors You don’t need a rigid schedule, but having predictable anchor points like morning routines, mealtimes, and wind-down hours can create a sense of safety. Mental health tip: Let your child help create a flexible daily plan using visuals, checklists, or apps. 2. Watch for Signs of Social or Emotional Regression Kids who thrive on peer interaction may feel isolated without school. Others may become more irritable, withdrawn, or clingy. What to look for:
How to respond: Be curious, not critical. “I noticed you’ve been quiet lately. Is something feeling different or weird?” 3. Make Space for Their Voice Let kids feel heard — especially about summer plans. Ask what they want to do, and try to include some of their ideas, even if they’re simple. Family-Wide Strategies That Help
Final Thought Summer isn’t just a break from school — it’s a chance to recalibrate emotionally. It’s okay if it’s not all sunshine. Just like the ocean, waves come and go. What matters is how we ride those waves together — with grace, with boundaries, and with space for our very real human needs. Take care of your mind, even in the sunshine. Need support this summer? Ola Kai Behavioral Health is here to help. We offer virtual behavioral health services for children, teens, and adults across Hawaii and Oregon. Visit: www.olakaibehavioralhealth.com
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Ashley A. ReneaWriting about life: the good, bad and ugly. Nothing fancy. Simply real talk among friends. ArchivesCategories |